Blessing or Curse?

Which is better:to care too much,or not to care at all?
This is a question that i always read on the bottom of stupid forwards i get,and somehow,i feel that it is meant for me.

It seems that every time a friend of mine is hurt,i end up hurt with them.I deal with my own heartbreaks very privately.i noticed this fact because after i recover is when i really start talking about what was bothering me.i realize how unhealthy that is,but its just the way i am i guess.

About a year and half ago,i went from being this overly sensitive person that cried about everything good and bad,to not being able to shed a single tear.thing is,i didn't mind being that way,hehe.things changed though.let me explain:my friends describe me as being the motherly type,i hurt for them,hold them while they cry,then try as best as i can to fix whatever it is broken in their life...and when i cant,i feel helpless,which in my opinion is the worst feeling a person can get.

She called me after midnight to cry about what a jerk he is...he called me to tell me that she rejected him and that he really wanted her...he cried to me on the phone telling me how much he loved her and couldn't get over her...she called me telling me how pointless life is now that they're not together anymore.
my reaction:i give them a time limit to be hurting,and then i start pulling them up as best as i know how.i keep saying:YOU FELL,AND ITS ALRIGHT,BUT YOU'RE ONLY ALLOWED TO STAY DOWN THERE FOR A WHILE,THEN ITS TIME TO GET UP,SO GET UP!

Problem with all of this,is that i ache as much as they do.I've been heartbroken,and the pain is so strong its almost crippling.so yes,i do understand,and thus i get the need to cry it out,to be hugged,to feel love more than any other time.its just that i cant cry anymore,i don't know why,i mean i still manage to cry when i see stories on TV about kids in Africa or when my mother and i have a fight and i get so angry!

My theory is that my tears are just locked up in my heart.of course concerning my friends,i still have my mind functioning clearly so I'm able to give advice when it is needed.Concerning myself,however,my mind is completely shutdown and i become NUMB.it gets so quiet inside my soul that if i try to listen really hard,i can only hear my aching heart beating steadily,and all that's left in the thundering silence when i fall asleep on a pillow wet from my tears,is the deep echo of an ache so strong that it manifests in a form of raw pain.

So back to the troubling question...is it really better to be absolutely carefree and just enjoying life and to the hell with the rest?or is it better to care for a world that doesn't give a damn?
well,i guess some people will really have a tendency to answer this differently than others would, i mean who would want to ache for a lifetime instead of get a trouble free life?

I would...life is all about choices,and i figure whats the point of living if you want to be careless and numb to others?If life was only black and white then this would indeed be my choice,the only thing I'd ask for in return though,is to get back the ability to cry,because i truly do believe it lessens the pain.maybe it will...someday.till then,i will still hurt for them,still feel for them,still stand tall,and still be there for them all.